ON INTEGRITY

Integrity is a shared process.

Integrity is interrelational.

Integrity is contextual.

Integrity is integrating.

Integrity is unscripted.

Integrity is a kind of super-attention.

Integrity is watching for the cracks in what you thought you knew.

Integrity is willingness to learn together.

~ Nora Bateson

Integrity is an important word and concept. It is critically important in spiritual and religious circles. Without integrity there can be no real spiritual growth in an individual or group. You can say that integrity is integral to attaining true fulfillment as a spiritual student.

The revelation that spiritual guru Deepak Chopra is mentioned multiple times in the email files linked to the Jeffrey Epstein case is, at a minimum, disturbing (LINK). A deeper dive into the situation, including how often so-called spiritual celebrities have difficulty maintaining integrity is here (LINK).

“My intent is to be generous of spirit and live with total integrity every day of my life.”
~ Deepak Chopra

“There is no such thing as a minor lapse of integrity.”
~ Tom Peters

I have often considered some spiritual celebrities as conduits to New Thought for many people. Author Wayne Dyer was such a way shower for me, leading me to being open enough to explore the Science of Mind in the 1980’s. I am grateful for that, and for much of the wisdom that Dyer shared over the years, even though he had his own lapses of integrity, including this (LINK).

One of the most disturbing factors of the crimes associated with Jeffrey Epstein and his wide circle of influential friends and clients is the extent to which such horrific behavior went on and was widely known (and therefore condoned). The victims numbered in the hundreds, and almost all were children at the time. The perpetrators number in the dozens, perhaps even the hundreds, and include world and business leaders. What all of this says about our society is worthy of deep reflection.

But our own house in spirituality and religion is far from perfect. The victims of failures of integrity by religious leaders number in the millions. This has been compounded by the repeated failure of those responsible to demand accountability by transgressors. And even when accountability has occurred, the results are often kept confidential allowing the perpetrators to relocate and offend again. Such violations of trust drive people from spiritual communities.

“As long as you have certain desires about how it ought to be you can’t see how it is.”
~ Ram Dass

We in spiritual communities and organizations have an interest in thinking of ourselves as good people, and we have an interest in being spiritual, which often means to be “nice,” no matter what. I have seen spiritual leaders who were toxic (LINK) protected by congregants, boards, and organizations. This was done for reasons including personal loyalty, a desire not to have a scandal revealed, or a sense that accusations must be proven beyond a doubt.

We in New Thought are nice people as a rule. We tend to think that we live in a friendly, even moral, universe and that people are basically good. We often pay a severe price for these beliefs.

“The opposite of reflexive niceness is integrity.”
~ James Hollis, Jungian analyst

Let’s look at these beliefs:

Our universe is not friendly or moral. It is evolutionary and amoral. We exist in our current forms because of violent collisions of planets, stars, and galaxies which allowed more complex elements to be formed and spread over wide distances. We exist in our current forms because of biological evolution, whose processes toward greater complexity and adaptation have resulted in the extinction of over 99% of all the species which have existed on earth. And we know that we are a transitional species, just as all others are; we will either evolve to more complex and well-adapted beings or become extinct as an evolutionary dead-end. Evolution is careless of the individual and of the species by nature.

Morality does not appear in our universe except as a human invention. Other species may and do cooperate, but they do so as a survival mechanism. Humans are capable of moral thought and actions, but it is something which must be learned and reinforced in the social structures around us. It too, is an evolutionary adaptation.

People have the capacity to be good and moral, but any number of things can limit that capacity, sometimes severely. We know scientifically that psychopaths have little or no ability for moral action or regret due to brain injuries, often occurring when in childhood. Research has shown that most psychopaths and sociopaths are incapable of regaining a sense of morality through any known treatments.

Of course, everyone who commits a violation of integrity does not have a physical condition limiting their capacity. In most cases, people simply decide to act out of integrity, usually by using rationalization. Everyone has done something out of integrity; most of us just about every day in some minor or significant way. It is important to remember that such actions are the result of a divided self, a self which is not integral.

Spiritual study and practices are in large part about realizing one’s wholeness, one’s integrity. To be in integrity means to be in your deepest truth. As that truth is realized more and more, it means to refuse to participate in behaviors which are out of integrity. It also means to speak out for integrity and justice and love in every community to which one belongs.

The Beloved Community does not tolerate behaviors which are out of integrity. Therefore, it requires people who are compassionate to fulfill their potential. We cannot be truly compassionate if we are out of integrity in our own lives; our communities cannot be compassionate if members are silent or complicit in behaviors which are out of integrity.

Our spiritual gurus know this yet often fail. We know this yet often fail. Our compassion is the only thing that can lead us to the realization of our true spiritual potential.

“Contradictions, whether personal or social, that could once remain hidden are coming unstoppably to light. It is getting harder to uphold a divided self….The trend toward transparency that is happening on the systems level is also happening in our personal relationships and within ourselves. Invisible inconsistencies, hiding, pretense, and self-deception show themselves as the light of attention turns inward….The exposure and clearing of hidden contradictions brings us to a higher degree of integrity, and frees up prodigious amounts of energy that had been consumed in the maintenance of illusions. What will our society be capable of, when we are no longer wallowing in pretense?”
~ Charles Eisenstein

Copyright 2025 – Jim Lockard

VACATION THOUGHTS

Whatever it may be that your soul, your heart needs may you find it easily, eagerly, gently, wondrously, and healthfully.
May it open you up and make you kinder, wiser, whole and healed.
May it make the world around and within you brighter, sweeter, spacious and nurturing.
May you have rest when you need, energy to do good, laughter like mountains and tears like a spring rain.
May you have mind and heart that open readily and release graciously. 
May your life go well and joyfully.
~ Leigh Shoju Loesch Macaro

One of the lovely things about France is that people here are serious about their vacation time. Most get 4 weeks or more and take the bulk of it from mid-July to the end of August. During that time, many businesses are closed, the big cities empty out quite a bit, and the freeways are full of vehicles with luggage on the roof.

As I write this, I am in a large house in the Beaujolais countryside (pictured) – a château if you will, owned by a dear friend of ours. We spend time here each summer. The population at the house has ranged from 40+ the night of our host’s 60^th birthday party last week, to 4 today – me and three young adults, the two children of our host and the copain or girlfriend of the son.

I should mention that Dorianne is at a larger château in Burgundy this week, for a chamber music seminar with 35 other musicians. We will go to their concert on Sunday and then many will return to this château in Beaujolais for a few days into next week.

This is a good time for reflection for me, as I work on my presentation for the Unity Eastern Region Conference (Oct 5-9), and have some interesting conversations with the young adults here. The topic seems to frequently stray into living in a very unpredictable world and trying to build a future.

The son is in the French army, training for their special forces; the daughter works for luxury fashion and beauty brands in Paris, traveling to places like Rome and Shanghai for work. Both are in their early 20’s. I marvel at their optimism, their accomplishments, and the ease with which they converse across the generations.

We are in liminal times when what has been is fading and no longer works as it once did, and what is emerging is too new to fully grasp, much less predict. They feel this uncertainty, but, as my own adult children do, these young people move forward in their lives, intent on developing the skills and attitudes necessary for these times. They do not cling to the past, they look ahead.

I am heartened by this attitude. While my generation is not leaving them the kind of world I would wish for, I can see them doing what they can to make things right. What I see as an unfair and uphill task, they see as simply their lives unfolding. I appreciate them more than I can say.

It is important for me to take time away from the normal routine, to have conversations with different people, and to be in a different space from time to time. I recommend it.

I’ll fly a starship
Across the universe divide
Until I reach the other side
I’ll find a place to rest my spirit if I can
Perhaps I may become a highwayman again
Or I may simply be a single drop of rain
But I will still remain
And I’ll be back again
And again, and again, and again
~ Jimmy Webb

Copyright 2025 – Jim Lockard

ON AGING, RETIRING, AND INTUITION

“It has become clear to me that aging itself does not bring wisdom. It often brings regression to childishness, dependency and bitterness over lost opportunities. Only those who are still intellectually, emotionally, spiritually growing inherit the richness of aging.”
~ James Hollis

What Matters Most

I am now nearing 73 ½ years of age and I have been contemplating how I am aging and what is changing within me. Not just the obvious aging process on my physical being, but how there are shifts in the way I see myself and the world in which I live.

I see many of my friends and acquaintances struggling with becoming older, often a struggle that began in their 30’s, when the first signs of natural limitation and decline begin. There are entire industries dedicated to encouraging us to resist aging at all costs, from the fashion and makeup companies, to self-help books, to purveyors of “medical solutions” to aging, to the marketers who bombard us with the need to stay young and physically attractive whatever the cost. The result is often worry, shame, and choices which do harm rather than good for us.

If there is one thing that my immersion in New Thought philosophy has taught me to develop in myself, it is the willingness to age on the outside while staying vital on the inside. After all, some of the most vital and creative older people I have known have been in New Thought. Through cultivating inner wisdom, intuition, and the consciousness of meaning making I can remain vital in a way that is appropriate to my physical age. Naturally, I take care of my physical being, but not to repress the aging process. I do so to remain healthy and able to live a full life for as long as possible. This process is one of conscious self-development over years, even decades, and it helps one to become an elder.

“Although an infant becomes a child simply by aging, a person cannot become an elder by simply becoming older. Elders fall into the category of things that are made, not born. Becoming an elder is not a ‘natural occurrence;’ the qualities needed don’t simply develop from physical changes brought on by aging. Rather, there is something meta-physical involved; something philosophical and spiritual that is required. Old age alone doesn’t make the elder.”
~ Michael Meade

Fate & Destiny: The Two Agreements of the Soul 

What differentiates the pathway of one who becomes embittered and miserable or reclusive in old age versus one who finds a rejuvenation of creativity and fulfillment? I suggest that it is the inner processes of thought and feeling – not so much what happens to a person, but how they interpret and give meaning to experiences. Do they feel that they live in a supportive universe or an adversarial one? Are they able to roll with the inevitable pains and losses of life or do they ruminate on how bad things keep happening to them? Have they come to terms with their own mortality? Have they developed a healing consciousness of love and compassion for themselves and others?

“When one gets older, if one is reasonable, one sees that soon one will have to leave the world, and therefore one should clarify what is eternal and what is passing. The aging process helps one to select what is important.”
~ Marie-Louise von Franz

“A Woman’s Way”

Aging is a reminder, often a troubling one, that our physical life is limited in time. It is also a reminder that some of our capacities become less robust over time. What we need, and generally do not receive from our society, is preparation for how to transition from the achieving/productive part of our life to what Jung called the “Second Adulthood” or the period of old age. The cultural milestone for this is often the age of 65 when one retires, either willingly or by rule. The transition into retirement requires a reset of one’s consciousness. Joseph Campbell puts it well:

“When I retired, I knew that I had to create a new life. I changed my manner of thinking about my life, moving out of the sphere of achievement, into the sphere of enjoyment and appreciation, relaxing into the wonder of it all.”
~ Joseph Campbell

In the US, it is not unusual for people to keep working well past the age of 65; some because of financial need, others because they want to keep on or because they cannot make the transition to retirement.

Here, we see what is missing when we have not cultivated a deeper relationship with our intuitive capacities in our adulthood. We feel the need to rely absolutely on our cognitive faculties rather than on inner knowing. This makes it more difficult to see the value of living without being busy or economically productive, or both. It is a form of denial brought on by a failure to cultivate a relationship with our inner power. The cultivation of a functioning relationship with intuition is a key to a fulfilling old age.

I am not saying to just be brave in the face of aging. I am saying we need to realize renewed value, meaning, and purpose in it. My life has become rich in different ways than it was before I retired. My pursuits are more about my own interests than about serving others or an organization. I have the time, or better, I take the time to be alone in thought, to walk the streets, to nap, to stay connected to friends and family, and to explore to a greater degree than was possible before. You might say that there are fewer “have to’s” and more “choose to’s.”

For some, old age may be a time of quiet reflection, for others a time of vigorous reinvention. There is, or should be, more time to pursue new interests and passions or to revisit old ones. Sometimes, added responsibilities arise, such as caring for grandchildren, but this an also be about reinvention. As always, our mental attitude is critical in creating our experience of life.

I know that as time goes by, some capacities will become more limited, However, I am doing the inner work to stay present to where I am in my development. I still do spiritual practices, but they are less rigorous than before, something I attribute to years of practice and a conscious cultivation of a connection to my inner wisdom. It is generally easier to access inner wisdom than it was before; a combination (I think) of lots of practice and a relaxation of my inner ego resistance over time.

For me, December is a symbolic month of preparing for the new year. I suggest you consider using this December to prepare for what is next for you with the aging process in the short, medium, and long terms. Contemplate creating an invitation to your intuitive knowing, the Spirit within you, to be more available to you as you release inner resistance. Do a mixture of concrete planning (getting your affairs in order as appropriate) and abstract visioning (how do you want to be at 70, 80, or 90?) Lay a sound foundation in consciousness for yourself as your age and learn to enjoy the process with gratitude!

“The great secret is to embody something essential in our lives. Then, undefeated by age, we can proceed with dignity and meaning, and, as the end approaches, be ready ‘to die with life’. For the goal of old age is not senility, but wisdom.”
~ Anthony Stevens

As always, your comments are welcomed! Please feel free to share this post with others who may be interested.

Copyright 2024 – Jim Lockard

THE DIVINE PLAN AND HUMAN ERROR

“We believe in divine patterns, and not divine plans.”
~ Ernest Holmes, Anatomy of Healing Prayer

“God doesn’t plan things, God is all that is.  An infinite purpose is a mathematical, logical, philosophical, and spiritual contradiction!  Therefore, by reason of the very nature of Reality it is necessary that the Divine impregnates the human and lets it alone to discover itself; however, the human is still subject to the law of its being.”
~ Ernest Holmes, Seminar Lectures

I will get to the election, but first some background. A common mistake in New Thought circles is to fail to fully understand the nature of the creative process, especially as it pertains to any plan or intentionality on the part of of the Universal (God, Spirit, Creative Intelligence, Infinite, etc.). This mistake can be seen when something negative or upsetting occurs, and the experience is attributed to a “divine plan” or that whatever happens is for the “highest and best.”

Such a belief is not consistent with New Thought teachings. It is more akin to fundamentalist belief in a micromanaging personal deity who directs and controls whatever happens, hence whatever happens is part of the “divine plan.” This error when it appears in New Thought students is rarely addressed, so it tends to continue to occur. As Ernest Holmes noted, “God doesn’t plan things, God is all that is.” It is our actualization of specific experience out of the infinite possibilities of Spiritual Potential that determines what happens in our realm of being.

“God is life; we make that life into living. God is love; we make divine love into loving. God is substance; we take the substantial reality and bring it through into the manifest world.”
~ Myrtle Fillmore

It is our individualized intelligence which actualizes some of the pure potential of the Infinite in our experience or into form. To the degree that we are in alignment with our inner divine qualities (Peace, Power, Beauty, Joy, Wisdom, Love, Light to name some), we use our individualized intelligence to direct the Energy of Life into positive outcomes, or we use it to turn negative outcomes around to whatever degree is possible.

And we are capable of directing that Energy of Life into negative, even catastrophic outcomes. We can do harm to ourselves, to others, to systems and institutions, in the short or long term, and that harm can be irreparable. The decision to respond to a text while driving and the death(s) and wreckage that results are an example of irreparable harm.

“We are centers or points in a Cosmic Universal Consciousness which is the Origin of all things.  On the scale of our individual lives we reproduce the Divine Order in Its entirety. The whole Divine nature is reproduced in us, but we are ignorant of the fact.  Our thought is creative, but in our ignorance, we use it destructively.”
~ Ernest Holmes, The Science of Mind

When we try to make everything positive, even deep loss or tragic decisions, we essentially refuse to differentiate between what is good and bad, positive and negative. We make the error of transposing the eternal perfection of the Universal Spirit existing in Oneness with the relative experience of being in the physical universe of duality. Duality may arise from Oneness, but it doesn’t look or feel like Oneness, ever. Duality is the realm of the opposites, where most evolutionary growth comes through the destruction of what currently exists.

This error of transposition may allow us to live in denial of the reality of our situation, which may seem like a comfort, but it also robs us of the full capacity to call forth our inner qualities to shift our situation. There is no divine plan. There is no deity with a personality. There is no life without psychic, emotional, and physical pain. We have access to an Infinite Intelligence, but we must actualize that intelligence through and into a dualistic reality.

“We have shown that man’s nature is the same as God’s Nature; we should have no intellectual difficulty in realizing that an Infinite Intelligence could not make an automatic individuality, and this explains why man suffers on his road to self-discovery.  His suffering is not God-ordained, because he creates his own experience as he becomes individualized.”
~ Ernest Holmes, The Science of Mind

“We have on the one hand the evolution of the individual life under the guidance of Divine Providence, which leads to harmony.  In contrast there is the freedom to live under the false guidance of a sense of being separated from Good, which leads to disaster and chaos.”
~ Ernest Holmes, Living The Science of Mind

The redemptive factor here is that no matter how bad things get, some degree of healing is possible. But there is no real possibility of healing without acceptance of the error and a willingness to atone for any harm done, to the degree that is a possibility. When we live in accordance with our spiritual principles, we are not excused from pain, indeed, we may be inviting it. But we experience that pain from a deep acceptance of the healing principles of the Divine within. We know that we are more than our pain, that the Spirit we actualize is unharmed and unharmable, and that there is always greater potential to actualize.

“So you look for patterns because that’s what humans do to try and make sense of things. In hope of some divine order. And you look in movies and songs and the things that you read for symbols, points and swirls that match your own. But the only real pattern there is, is the one you make when you hold up a mirror. And reflect.”
~ Iain Thomas,
“I Wrote This for You”

We live, move, and have our being in a universe which evolves via chaos and destruction. Our physical bodies can exist because earlier in time, stars, galaxies, and other celestial bodies collided, exploded, and dissipated creating heavier (more complex) elements in the process. This made life and complex organisms possible. The energy and matter in our universe grows and evolves through stress and chaos.

We are born into our life experience via the stress of leaving our mother’s body, a stress that prepares us (and mother) for what lies ahead. To imagine that spiritual growth, or any growth for that matter, would be free of stress, uncertainty, and chaos is to be willfully ignorant of the reality of our own existence.

The result of the US elections will lead to a great deal of pain, chaos, and uncertainty for many, including many who made the choice to select the next administration to govern them. The geopolitical world has become more dangerous for everyone. The ecological imbalances driving the climate crises are not going to be effectively addressed for some time, and time is of the essence. Iconoclastic worldviews, with their attendant racism, ethnic hatred, sexism, homo- and trans-persecution, general fears and mistrust have been given room to express and expand.

As in all things, this pain will not be evenly distributed, but it will be widespread. If we look at the decision as a collective one, we can see that it arose from a failure to confront the collective shadow of a nation, a culture, and some failed principles; but also from a very rational fear on the part of many about the direction of the world and their nation. No collective decision is universal, just as no individual decision is made without some internal doubt.

The redemptive possibilities of this decision are enormous. The deeper the hole you dig, the more opportunity to rise higher. But this decision will do real harm – it already has – and the willingness to atone seems to be missing from those who voted otherwise, and will not likely arise for some time, if ever, in those who are elated about the result. The reality is that had the other side won, there would have been harm there as well, but I think of a lesser degree and with greater hope of positive action.

Now, there is a collective need to mourn for many, a need to go within and do some serious self-reflection for all, and an ongoing need to practice the principles of New Thought for those of us who have been fortunate enough to find them and integrate them into our lives.

“There is a system within nature that seems to lead to a crisis of one form of development that begins to become chaotic, begins to come into greater disorder and greater breakdown, and there is a pattern in these quantum jumps in which the system jumps to a higher order.”
~ Barbara Marx Hubbard

As always, your comments are welcomed. Please share this with those who may be interested. Know that I hold you, dear readers, in my heart.

Copyright 2024 – Jim Lockard

A reminder: I authored the Daily Guides in the current edition of Science of Mind Magazine. Here is a link to download the guides:

SoM_Nov2024_Daily_Guides.pdf

And explore the magazine on-line or in hard copy. It is worth your time.

I HAVE A LOT ON MY EMOTIONAL PLATE – HOW ABOUT YOU? PART 2

“Our only problem is that we want not to have any problems.”
~ Buddhist saying

“The familiar life horizon has been outgrown; the old concepts, ideals, and emotional patterns no longer fit; the time for a passing of a threshold is at hand.”
~ Joseph Campbell

In Part 1 (LINK), we began to look at the emotional impact of living in complex and challenging times. What differentiates this moment in history from challenging times in the past is the higher degree of complexity, not only of the issues facing us, but also due to the highly technological times in which we live. We have nearly instantaneous global communications, social media, and growing disinformation agents using social media to muddy the waters (LINK).

Of course, all of this is in addition to whatever personal challenges one may be facing currently. And of that that is in addition to whatever foundational wounds or trauma from one’s past exist and how they amplify emotional sensitivity in the current moment. This is a very difficult time for just about everyone from an emotional standpoint.

We are seeing reports that therapists have no openings for new patients, suicide rates are climbing (particularly among young people), and tempers are flaring across the public sphere. All of this means we are facing a strong pull to evolve to greater complexity, one which many of us are unable to adapt.

“With the enormous expansion of our consciousness and knowledge in physics and technology, which have gone ahead at such tremendous speed, the rest of humanity has not been able to keep pace. We have not been able to keep up morally, neither with our feelings nor with our minds.”
~ Marie Louise von Franz

The coping mechanisms of denial, compartmentalization, and passive-aggressive behavior are no longer sufficient to shield us from our day-to-day stressors. It is hard to disown feelings when they are triggered every day. It is hard to deny the challenges facing us when we realize both the seriousness of the threats and the failure of our institutions to meet the challenges effectively, or, in some cases, even to admit that they exist.

“[W]hat we disown does not go away. It lives on within us-out of sight, out of mind, but nevertheless real-an unconscious alter ego hiding just below the threshold of awareness. It often erupts unexpectedly under extreme emotional circumstances.”
~ Connie Zweig

We see more road rage, more mass shootings, more hair-triggered tempers, more depression, and other signs of too much emotional stress. This will likely continue to occur in increasing patterns.

But none of us needs to go down this path if we use our psychological and spiritual tools and techniques effectively. These include a belief in our divine and human potential as well as an intention to realize our best life possible. For some this will require taking and mental and emotional step back to allow new energy to flow within our system. Perhaps a brief fast from the news or from social media is in order. Perhaps a retreat in nature or simply to a place where solitude is available; or a retreat with others for the purpose of reconnecting with one’s true nature.

“Emotion regulation is not about controlling what you feel. It’s about choosing how you respond. Wise people don’t suppress emotion. They find constructive ways to express it. Intense feelings don’t always demand immediate reactions. They often benefit from deep reflection.”
~ Adam M. Grant

Another possibility is to engage with a challenging situation of concern to you – feeding the hungry, volunteering at a non-profit, becoming an election worker, advocating for a cause dear to you. Any of these things can provide an active way to reprogram your emotional settings. We cannot hide from the world and its challenges, nor are we meant to do that. We are designed to engage with life, but from a place of emotional health and well-being. Sometimes we need to do something to restore or deepen that well-being.

“There is no change from darkness to light or from inertia to movement without emotion.”
~ C.G. Jung, Collected Works 9i

Emotion is the engine of demonstration/manifestation. Emotion gives energy to the thoughts which accumulate to build beliefs. Emotion gives energy to the actions we take to translate those beliefs into behaviors. It is our feeling of life that is our experience of life. So emotional work is essential work. It begins by learning to control our impulses. Meditation and visualization are powerful tools to aid in developing emotional intelligence.

“The ability to control impulse is the base of will and character. By the same token, the root of altruism lies in empathy, ability to read emotions in others. If there are any two moral stances that our times call for, they are precisely these, self-restraint and compassion.”
~ Daniel Goleman

Here, Daniel Goleman, who has done amazing work in the area of emotional intelligence (LINK), mentions the need to control our impulses. This is not to be polite, but primarily to allow us to have access to our faculties. When we are overly impulsive, we lose connection with our inner intuitive knowing as well as with our better nature. Self-restraint allows us to stay in touch with these positive aspects of ourselves.

Compassion, remember, is not being nice – it is being truthful from a place of love. We do little good when we act without self-control or emotional intelligence. This is often why we shy away from activism for social justice, we fear the rough and tumble nature of such activities because so many people engage from a lack of emotional intelligence.

“People think to be radical is to be confrontational, hostile, and angry when what is truly counterculture is understanding, curiosity, self-discipline, a backbone, combined with spiritual and emotional depth.”
~ Ayishat Akanbi

The key is to do your personal work – spiritual practices, emotional development, and more, developing them into a regular and ongoing set of practices – before you engage. An important function of spiritual community is to prepare people to contribute to building a better world (#aworldthatworksforeveryone) by helping to develop spiritual and emotional intelligence. We are empowered when we bring our best selves to a cause or to a project. This includes bringing a strong cast of spiritual principles and practices which we have embodied and habituated.

Emotional and spiritual intelligence are the foundations of spiritual realization, not just in achieving states of awareness, but in learning to continually develop higher levels of spiritual expression. Emotional intelligence gives us the discipline to do our work and the maturity to interact with others wisely and lovingly. It allows us to set healthy boundaries and to extend ourselves when called to do so without placing ourselves or others in jeopardy due to our own unhealed insecurities.

“When we practice generating compassion, we can expect to experience the fear of our pain. Compassion practice is daring. It involves learning to relax and allow ourselves to move gently toward what scares us. The trick to doing this is to stay with emotional distress without tightening into aversion, to let fear soften us rather than harden into resistance.”
~ Pema Chödrön

We all want to live in truth, to be able to bring our best selves to bear on what is actually happening. It does not serve us to hide or obscure what might be painful to know. Compassion is daring because compassion is truth and love. It may be tough love, it may be unsettling, it may be very painful. It takes great strength and character to express compassion, whether to yourself or to another.

There is no path to compassion except through our fear and suffering. Compassion arises from our fears and our pain. When we deny them, we deny ourselves the realization of a compassionate heart and we deny the world our best self in expression. Fortunately, it is our spiritual practices which are key elements in healing and strengthening our emotional immune system. Using our teachings and engaging with our spiritual communities to create mutual support systems is essential.

As always, your comments are welcomed.

“Nirvana is right here, in the midst of the turmoil of life. It is the state you find when you are no longer driven to live by compelling desires, fears, and social commitments, when you have found your center of freedom and can act by choice out of that.”
~ Joseph Campbell

Copyright 2024 – Jim Lockard

HOW MUCH IS TOO MUCH? BREAKDOWN, BURNOUT, AND SELF-CARE

“What a load of responsibility we assume that we were never meant to carry.”

~ Ernest Holmes, Creative Mind

“My New Thought heritage carries a tradition of ‘seeing no evil’ and only ‘holding the High Watch.’ My professional status requires me to offer hope and consolation to those who suffer. My personal self is exhausted.”

~ Rev. John M. McLean, Unity of Nashville

In our determination to stay positive and to be a healing force for good in the world no matter what, we may just be burning ourselves out. This past year saw no letup in things to be concerned about; in fact, there was an increase. The COVID-19 pandemic has increased the pressure on just about everyone, especially those who have lost family members or friends and those on the “front lines,” the essential workers who have been maxed out by increasing requirements and decreasing opportunities for relief. Where there is pressure, there is often stress as a response. The US is seeing a sharp increase in violence, with data showing that many have used their relief checks to purchase guns due to increased fear in many areas. Reports show that depression and other mental and emotional health issues, already on the rise before COVID, are rising even faster.

During all of this, spiritual leaders have been trying to adapt to an online environment while maintaining some sense of connection with their members so that they could know where spiritual support was needed. The regular in-person meetings and conferences which help to sustain both spiritual leaders and members were either cancelled or put online, with the loss of the person-to-person contact and yes, the hugs, that are so necessary to our well-being. Indeed, as noted in the next quote, everyone in caring and healing professions has been stretched, sometimes to the breaking point, by the demands of our time.

“The way in which many of us in the healing professions carry this vast, impossible assignment of ‘fixing’ what is wrong in others is replicated through what Jung called the archetype of ‘the wounded healer.’ It is disgraceful that so many of our training procedures neglect this intrapsychic pathologizing feature, which lies deep within the soul of most therapists and drives many to anxiety, stress, substance abuse, and burnout. This unaddressed configuration alone, this engine of vocational identification, represents one of the prime Shadows of our profession(s).”

~ James Hollis, Ph.D., Jungian analyst, Prisms

The kind of person who is attracted to New Thought teachings is often someone who seeks personal growth and wants to be in community with other spiritual seekers. The teachings are positive and sometimes lead to students being driven by their own sense of insecurity to strive beyond what is optimal for them. This may include denial of illness or emotional issues. It is critical to learn how to find a balance between engaging with the world and self-care.

We overextend ourselves, pushing to grow and succeed. Then, when we are isolated and deprived of personal in-person connection, we suffer. In doing the wise thing and following scientific and medical guidelines and government rules, we placed ourselves at risk in some ways while protecting ourselves and others in other ways.

As Dr. Holmes wrote, we all too often take on too much responsibility. If this is our pathway, then we are doubly burdened when circumstances add to the responsibilities we are already carrying. Finding a balance so that we stay motivated AND healthy is important. None of us can answer every call to get involved. Much of my inner work these days is focused on finding what is truly mine to do, versus what is best left to others.

As we work to become more authentic, that is, as we move closer to our own soul’s agenda, we learn to let go of what is not ours to do and embrace what is. This means that we say no to some requests or opportunities, the ones which do not deeply resonate for us. We release the need to be a savior or to be seen as always willing to sacrifice for others. This gives necessary space for reflection, for relaxation, and for re-creation, the important aspects of self-care. When we are doing self-care properly, we have energy for what is truly ours to do. We must learn the value of the Sabbath.

“If we only stop when we are finished with all our work, we will never stop, because our work is never completely done… Sabbath … liberates us from the need to be finished.”

~ Wayne Muller

Discerning what is “mine to do” is a great challenge for many of us. It requires deep work over time to grow in clarity about who I am and what I am about. It means learning to hold my own counsel and not leap to get the approval of others while remaining teachable. As I go through this process of growth and realization, I must come to terms with the reality of the choices I have.

“Remove yourself from the situation, change it, or accept it totally. If you want to take responsibility for your life, you must choose one of these three options, and you must choose now. Then accept the consequences. No excuses. No negativity. No psychic pollution. Keep your inner space clear.”

~ Eckhart Tolle

I suggest a self-audit. Sit alone and notice what is going on within and without – physical, emotional, mental, spiritual. Write down what comes up for you during this process. It has been over a year of not-normal living and it must have had its effects on you, many of which you may have understandably ignored or repressed. You may be hurting, depressed, sad, or less physically healthy than before. Rather than being self-critical, try a more self-nurturing approach of self-care. Find someone who will support you in a “recovery” program – just someone to talk and pray with on the telephone or over coffee as that becomes safe again.

My own process during the pandemic has been to stay close to home (no choice there), but to enjoy my surroundings with daily walks for self-enrichment and to stay in shape. My wife, Dorianne, and I have also enjoyed cooking together, trying new recipes, and we have tried to stay in touch with friends and family with regular video calls. I have continued my teaching online and she has her online teaching and consulting as well. I have also been transitioning more and more into retirement, as so many of my friends and colleagues are either engaging or contemplating. This adds another layer to what is going on in this unique time, but it is an important one, as are all significant life transitions.

“When I retired, I knew that I had to create a new life. I changed my manner of thinking about my life, moving out of the sphere of achievement, into the sphere of enjoyment and appreciation, relaxing into the wonder of it all.”

~ Joseph Campbell

So, continue to be positive, but remember self-care, remember to let others take on what isn’t yours to do, and give yourself the time for Sabbath – rest and care of the soul.

As always, your comments are appreciated! Please share this post with others who may be interested.

Copyright 2021 – Jim Lockard

ISOLATION AND THE RE-EMERGENCE OF SOCIETY: SOME THOUGHTS

“. . .the frenetic pace of life has subsided. We’re no longer hurrying around, taking kids all over the city for friends and hobbies. There are no social engagements. It feels as if we’re in a cross between hibernation and meditation, hunkering down together to discern what really matters in life. I am, on the whole, unconcerned about our children’s education because this is a unique chance for them to step off a fast, ferocious treadmill. They can just play cards, table tennis, or – some hope – read books.”

~ Tobias Jones

As we begin the phase of getting used to self-isolating, we may be finding that there are things about ourselves that we either did not know or had not experienced in some time. How we respond to being home in an enforced way; how we respond to prolonged periods alone or with our shelter-mates; how we respond to demands from work or the fear associated with having lost our job. An article (LINK) by Tobias Jones, journalist and author in The Guardian triggered some of these thoughts for me.

After a week or so, we may be moving toward some kind of schedule or routine. Maybe we are consuming entertainment, reading books, or playing games with the family. Maybe we are beginning to contemplate who we are without our normal routines and the various aspects of our identity associated with being out of our homes some or most of the time. We begin to wonder what things will be like when this phase of the pandemic is over. How will the world be reordered (or will it)? From such thoughts arises our sense of vulnerability to our living conditions.

“I’m not fetishizing vulnerability. It’s a frightening thing. But vulnerability brings humility and reflection. And one of the blessings of this dark season is our awareness of the fragility of our arrogant society. It seems, too, that we’ve woken up to those who are most defenseless. Sure, there’s self-interest in our new-found empathy, because in a pandemic you’re only as safe as the most vulnerable. But contagion at least means that the vapid slogan from the last crisis – that ‘we’re all in it together” – might this time be true.”

~ Tobias Jones

Can a shift in our thinking about what it means to be in society together – at every level from household to globe – emerge from this crisis and lead us to a greater wisdom in co-creating sustainable and livable societies on our planet? Can we be truly more inclusive and appreciative of diversity of all kinds so that we can weave stronger and more compassionate communities? It is being reported as I write this that the European Union is placing an environmental focus on economic recovery plans from the COVID-19 pandemic. That is a good sign. In fact, the basics of the so-called Green New Deal in the US would have provided a much better prepared set of systems, including health care, logistics, and industry, than is being experienced currently. Shouldn’t groups such as Extinction Rebellion (LINK) be at the table as future plans are developed? Who have we left out in the past? We are finding that it is the everyday people who truly make our communities function, aren’t we?

“We can no longer fail to notice those we have previously overlooked. The homeless – for whom the instruction to ‘stay home’ means nothing – are thrown into sharp relief on our deserted streets. We suddenly see that those who are still working in public, risking their own health – the cashiers, couriers and nurses – are those paid a pittance and often with no contractual commitments from their employers. Never has it been so apparent that our society is built on exploitation.”

~ Tobias Jones

Indeed, we are seeing how our society measures value – in economic terms for the most part – and how that can produce consequences which affect us all. Now, some of the lowest paid and purportedly least skilled workers have been revealed to be our lifeline when the fragile structure of our society is impacted by an invisible virus. Will we remember to reorder our priorities to reflect this when we are past this phase?

Oh, and brace yourself for this: If confinement measures work, those who advocated the strategy will be pilloried as Cassandras who shut down the economy for no reason, because “not that many people died.” There will be much acrimony when we come out of this isolation phase by those who have lost something they value – if it is only their sense of being self-righteous. But we must keep our focus on what we are creating together – societies which serve as living systems and  work better than in the past; economic systems which serve humanity rather than just a few; and governments which are truly representative of the people. We are being called to awaken a greater generosity of spirit in how we view ourselves and each other.

“If we look deep, close and long enough, if we become still and allow ourselves to be empty, we might see what happens here. Right now, in this moment there lies an expression of the eternal within us. No boundaries at all. Just compassion. In the hectic trance of our everyday lives this might seem cynical and ridiculous, but here during those weird days of isolation and politically induced slowness lies the glimpse of a new hope.”

~ Jan Kaspers (LINK)

Once again, compassion (LINK) is the key. The sense of oneness with all, with everyone, and the love and caring which arises from the compassionate heart. Perhaps, just perhaps, this experience is leading us toward that greater expression, even as we mourn those who are sick and dying, and we mourn the structures of the past which no longer serve who we are becoming. We grieve, we mourn, we hospice; then we midwife our new ways of being into form.

All of this is possible as we envision a reset of what community is and how it functions. The temptations to revert to the past will be strong, especially for those who benefited from those systems. It will take a strong collective will to bring love, wisdom, and compassion to the table. Let each of us be a voice for that level of inclusion, cooperation, and the immense potential of our collective hearts and voices. Perhaps the best way to spend this time of isolation is to do our inner work to develop and expand our capacity for compassion, wisdom, and love. And to envision a world that works for everyone as more than an aspiration – as a reality unfolding beginning with our intentions in the now moment.

“But it does feel as if the world’s reset button has been pushed, as if we’re defragging society’s hard drive. Once we boot up again, we might find ourselves in a better place.”

~ Tobias Jones

#AWorldThatWorksForEveryone #TheGlobalVision #TheBelovedCommunity

 

Copyright 2020 – Jim Lockard